Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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