Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
