i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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