hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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