New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
