Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
