sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
