I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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