Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
