Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
