video games are the ultimate cock blocker
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize