just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
