There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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