I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
