Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Randomize
