matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
oh god the rape fog is back!
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
