no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Lo siento on account of my penis...
The adults are the big ones right?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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