Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Randomize
