How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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