My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Randomize
