She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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