just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
