ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
