I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
