I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
