And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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