i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Randomize
