Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
