Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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