Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
