Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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