I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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