Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
