Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Is it penis luge time yet?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
