"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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