no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize