birth control should be required to get into college
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
