I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
