I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
whose parrot is this?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
