never play flip cup with pint glasses
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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