Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
