you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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