I just made out with a guy for $7.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
