you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
