No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize