Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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