I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize