Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I need a beard to bite.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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