i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
