you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
