it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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