How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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